Live Support

Safe, effective drug/alcohol treatment

All across this country in small towns, rural areas and cities, alcoholism and drug abuse are destroying the lives of men, women and their families. Where to turn for help? What to do when friends, dignity and perhaps employment are lost?

The answer is Palm Partners Recovery Center. It’s a proven path to getting sober and staying sober.

Palm Partners’ innovative and consistently successful treatment includes: a focus on holistic health, a multi-disciplinary approach, a 12-step recovery program and customized aftercare. Depend on us for help with:

4 Surprising Advantages of Anxiety You Might Appreciate

4 Surprising Advantages of Anxiety You Might Appreciate

(This content is being used for illustrative purposes only; any person depicted in the content is a model)

Author: Justin Mckibben

Some would say “good things come to those who wait,” but others would add “only what is left by those who hustle.” Our characteristics can seem like virtues or defects depending on the lens through which they are examined, or the circumstances they arise from. There are always pros and cons, even if we have to take a very close look to find them. Sometimes, even the parts about ourselves we are most unsure of can be useful. So then what would be the advantages of anxiety?

How could our fear or stressful uncertainty help us? What good can come of being anxious? Here are 4 surprising advantages of anxiety.

  1. Doubt and double-checking

This one is all about balance, which isn’t easy for those who struggle with anxiety. While it is true that following up is time consuming, sometimes the time is worth it. Anxiety causes you to doubt, which can lead to double-checking. That feeling of something not being quite right can have us taking inventory, and sometimes this helps us catch things we may have missed.

One of the advantages of anxiety here is there will be many occasions when your double-checking proves useful. How many times have you asked someone if they were OK, and they say they are, but then it turns out they aren’t? Doubt and double-checking might help you push past that pretense and get to the heart of the matter.

Also, if you are depending on someone else to complete a task. Sometimes people forget. Perhaps people are afraid to ask for help. Sometimes they are misinformed and need course correction. While micro-managing can be irritating, double-checking may help you find a problem before it becomes a problem.

Yes, you may end up experiencing unnecessary stress and worry. It may become annoying to others that you need constant reassurance. In extreme cases you could even have unnecessary medical investigations due to health anxiety, leading to injuries caused by medical investigations or treatments.

Again, it is all about balance. Even if reassurance is a good thing, you can still have too much of a good thing.

  1. More careful and thoughtful

Fear is often not that useful to us, but it can be. Worry stems from fear, and the greatest danger of worry is that it is more likely to lead to inaction than it is to useful action. People who worry excessively are commonly overwhelmed by their anxieties. So much so, in fact, they ultimately don’t face their worries because resistance seems futile.

However, there are times when worry can actually be productive. The advantages of anxiety often have a lot to do with the idea of insurance. Like with any form of insurance, you are creating a back-up in case something happens, and this is useful. Just like with a car and an insurance policy, your anxiety may teach you to be more careful and protective.

That goes for your own peace of mind, your property and other people.

Worry also allows us to be more thoughtful of others, because we also come to worry about their well-being. Anxiety can help us be more conscious of our actions and how it will impact others, or how others will see us as a result. It can make us more compassionate and even more giving.

Strategic worrying is the best way to utilize this anxiety. It means making an honest evaluation of whether worrying is helping you on a case by case basis. If you connect worrying and positive behaviors, then the worrying may be worth it to you. If you are only stressing yourself without taking action, it is merely wasted energy.

  1. Prepared when things aren’t OK

This goes with the first two advantages of anxiety quite naturally. Anxious people love to rely on the idea of better safe than sorry. They have checked and double checked; they have tried to be as careful as they can. So when things are difficult, or when things go wrong, they are definitely prepared.

When things do go wrong, people with anxiety almost have the unique position of a fortune teller being vindicated. They have had time to make sure back-up plans and safety-nets in place. At the very least, they have mentally prepared themselves for that worst-case scenario. Some of us who struggle with anxiety have almost built up immunity to it.

It is not so much to say that it is good to always expect the worst, because that can lead to compromising your standards and a willingness to settle where you shouldn’t. However, knowing that you have put things in place just in case is reassuring that you’ve done all you can. Then, even if things fail you cannot say you didn’t at least do your best.

So essentially, being prepared for when things go wrong shouldn’t be an excuse to prematurely accept defeat. Instead these advantages to anxiety give you a reason to take more action.

  1. Excited when everything is OK

On the flip-side to that last point, another of the big advantages of anxiety is when you are surprised to learn that everything is OK. As we were saying, anxiety can have you preparing for the worst and jumping to negative conclusions, but when those premonitions don’t come to fruition, it is both relieving and exciting.

You basically give yourself a little rush with that experience of relief and happiness when you learn your fears have been averted, especially if your anxieties have almost convinced you that your nightmare scenario came true. That feeling of discovering everything isn’t what is seemed can be truly uplifting. This is probably the most gratifying of the advantages of anxiety.

It is nice when our expectations of a situation are exaggerated. We find some things are easier than we expect. Sometimes, this can make us even more proud of all the work we had done leading up to that moment because we overcame our fear, while still being prepared either mentally, physically or even financially not to come out OK.

As someone who has battled with anxiety a lot in life, I can say that knowing I was ready, even when I didn’t end up needing it, was an extremely gratifying feeling.

If you have an anxiety disorder it can interfere with your life in some very big ways. If you feel like you need more support with getting it under control, please consider some form of treatment. Anxiety and other psychological disorders are common to those who also struggle with substance abuse. If you or someone you love is struggling, help is available. Palm Partners offers dual diagnosis treatment to help people with mental illness and addiction issues to heal and recover. Please, call now.

    CALL NOW 1-800-951-6135

Mental Strength VS Tough Act

Mental Strength VS Tough Act

(This content is being used for illustrative purposes only; any person depicted in the content is a model)

Author: Justin Mckibben

Mental and emotional strength and stability are not always easy to develop, although many would say it is easier to fake. While some people do legitimately have a stronger sense of self naturally, others will live off a pattern of protecting themselves mentally and emotionally through acting tough. Acting tough may meet your needs as far as a quick fix, boosting the ego as a defense mechanism. Still, the tough act is not a strategy that is sustainable.

Mental strength is not to say you are stronger or smarter than anyone. Lacking in mental strength does not mean you don’t have the same capacity for thought and understanding, it just means when the pressure is potently applied there is more of a chance that you will suffer. Some people think that the tough act will help them improve their mental strength. However acting tough just fakes strength while not allowing people to grow.

Here are some differences between mental strength and putting on a tough act.

  1. Insecurities

The tough act typically has that element of outward ego that proclaims the individual as the best thing breathing. The person will have an overcompensating confidence that insists upon itself. However the truth behind it is the person is overrun with their insecurities. They refuse to expose any weakness, which hinders connection with others.

People with mental strength will actually admit to their faults and invest energy and time into self-improvement. These people realize that while they may fall, they are still able to grow.

  1. Failure

When it comes to falling down, the person using the tough act will insist that failure is not an option. They will never surrender or accept defeat, which means they cannot learn from their losses. The irony is that this attitude rarely prevents people from losing. Meanwhile it blocks them off from trying something new later because the ego fears the loss.

People who have mental strength understand that every failure is just a stepping stone to greatness. Mentally strong individuals view every shortcoming as an opportunity to learn what doesn’t work and build off their new perspective. These people know they fall so they can learn how to get back up.

  1. Denying the Self

The tough act has a pretty recognizable symptom in most cases- the individual only expresses their emotions when it comes to anger. This person will deny their pain, sadness, fear and even excitement. When it comes to pain they would rather grit and bear it then let anyone see them sweat. This again prevents them from growing through their pain and even from setting boundaries.

Mental strength will show itself for what it is. When this person feels fear or sadness they will be honest with others and with themselves. But just because they express these feelings doesn’t mean they let them dictate their lives. Their ability to be self-aware and expressive lets them monitor how their emotions impact their behaviors and their relationships.

  1. Control

This is probably one of the most common traits of people who try to act tough as oppose to actually having mental strength. The tough act will have someone trying to appear as if they are in control, having power over others and dominion over any situation. They try to force their will onto people and circumstances to make sure things go their way because it creates an illusion of strength and superiority.

However, true mental strength comes from having self-control, not controlling others. This individual wants to understand and manage their emotions by directing their own thoughts and perspective because they understand that they are only responsible for their own reaction to any given situation. They know their strength comes from their ability to adapt, not from trying to force life to go their way.

For people who rely on the tough act, it is not to say you have no mental strength, it just means you could build on it holistically to determine where you rely on a misguided ego instead of developing your mental and emotional muscles. The more practice you actually put into exercising mental strength the more you will let go of the act. By changing your strategy and adopting a new attitude toward these feelings you actually better prepare yourself for the journey ahead. When the tough gets going, the tough act doesn’t cut it without the mind to follow through.

In recovery from drugs and alcohol, mental strength is something we have to learn in order to grow and flourish. It is not always easy to break these habits, but if we can separate from the substance and get the foundation we need we have a great shot at becoming stronger than we ever thought possible. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please call toll-free 1-800-951-6135

2 Common Insecurities and Strategies to Overcome Them

2 Common Insecurities and Strategies to Overcome Them

(This content is being used for illustrative purposes only; any person depicted in the content is a model)

Author: Justin Mckibben

Being insecure is nothing to be ashamed of because we all share varying levels of insecurities, but insecurity is also a trait of the negative ego that has a real potential to undermine the gifts we have been given in life and the purpose we are meant to serve through chasing those passions. The great sense of distrust is the root of our insecurities, and that distrust comes in many forms.

We distrust ourselves and our worth.

We distrust the value of our accomplishments.

We distrust those we love to actually love us and be faithful to that love.

We distrust our capacity to fulfill our destiny.

Depending on the kind of experiences you have, the severity of your insecurities may vary. Factors that impact your experience include:

Se here let us take a look at 2 big insecurities we experience and strategies to overcome them that can actually improve our lives.

  1. Failure or Rejection

There has been actual research on happiness that suggests up to 40% of our “happiness quotient” is based on recent life events, so subsequently any recent failures or rejections can significantly affect the way we feel about ourselves, shaping insecurities based on negative self-image.

The biggest negative contributors to happiness are:

  • Ending a relationship
  • Death of a loved one
  • Job loss
  • Negative health events

Our unhappiness with such events is directly linked to our self-esteem, failure and rejection can elevate our insecurities.

“Failures, repeated failures, are finger posts on the road to achievement. One fails forward toward success.”

-C. S. Lewis

It has also been said that rejection inevitably leads us to see not just ourselves but also other people more negatively, at least for a time, while those who have lower self-esteem to begin with are more sensitive to failure.

It may help to understand that failure is a nearly ubiquitous experience, and that the cure for insecurities created through failures and rejections is actually persevering through adversity. Pushing through these rejections can do an incredible job of raising self-esteem once a victory is accomplished.

“It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all, in which case you have failed by default.”

-J. K. Rowling

So instead of allowing these insecurities to defeat you permanently, the better strategy is to get out and engage with your life. Persevere through the setbacks and believe failing is part of the process.

In recovery from drugs and alcohol failure may seem like a death-sentence, but feeling hopeless is not the last thing you ever have to feel as long as you can follow it with feeling something like hope or willingness to try a new way. There is always a chance to change, despite relapse or feelings of rejection from family or friends, you can recover.

  1. Confidence and Social Anxiety

It is probably safe to assume anyone reading this has at some point experienced a lack of confidence in social situations. Social anxiety and insecurities associated with it all stem from some form of the fear of being judged by others- and by being judged being determined as unworthy or unwanted. As a result of the insecurities coupled with lack of confidence people will:

  • Avoid social situations
  • Experience anxiety just thinking about social events
  • Feel self-conscious and uncomfortable during them

The fear of not being enough is a huge element of social anxiety as distorted beliefs about your self-worth, and a distorted belief about the extent to which other people are judging you, weigh heavily on how you carry yourself and how you react to social situations.

“Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength.”

-Charles Spurgeon

The key word there is “distorted” because the reality is that you are worth so much, and most of the time people are more focused on how they are being judged themselves than on judging others.

An even more effective truth is that those who do judge are often doing so in light of their own insecurities, so in reality their opinions are probably a lot less than accurate because they put too much value in the superficial features of life instead of character and integrity.

In cases of lacking confidence or social anxiety, you can overcome your insecurities by refuting the inner critic. Instead of letting that voice tell you that you’re being judged and found lacking, remind yourself of all the reasons that you are amazing. Use positive and uplifting self-talk to establish a belief in the best version of yourself you have the capacity to be.

“We are what we believe we are.”

-C.S. Lewis

Avoiding social situation just makes it worse, so putting your own feet to the flame will help you practice the strategy of building and uplifting yourself. Stigma against addiction can also make it easier to see the bad instead of the good. The more you do to exercise your ability to believe in yourself, the closer you come to overcoming the insecurities that fool your mind into thinking you are separate from the world and undeserving of others.

Then one of the ultimate tools for defeating your insecurities, especially in recovery, is to stop focusing on yourself so much! The intense self-focus makes it easier to highlight those insecurities. Try being conscious of what other people could be feeling, it shows you you’re not alone in your insecurities and that sticking together and having confidence in each other takes the power away from those social anxieties.

All insecurities are just another part of life. Some often hold us back, but in a way these fears and anxieties also have the potential to serve a greater purpose by inspiring self-improvement and developing new behaviors. In the face of insecurities try to see how these thoughts are imagined fears based on assumptions and not facts. Be willing to accept and love yourself, and know there is worth in who you are despite whatever inside or outside of you tells you otherwise.

Insecurities in recovery can lead to a difficult time with developing healthy relationships, both with ourselves and with others, but there is more to life than hiding from the things we are afraid of. Sobriety teaches us so much about the lives we have the potential to live, and getting off to the right start in recovery can make all the difference. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please call toll-free 1-800-951-6135

7 Fearless Ways Successful People Think

7 Fearless Ways Successful People Think

Author: Shernide Delva

Ever wonder what makes a successful person successful? It can be challenging to make goals for your future, especially after overcoming an addiction. However, in recovery, you finally have the opportunity to live successfully without fear being in the way. Furthermore, a recently published list defined the seven fearless ways successful people think. Perhaps you can implement one or more of these personality traits and get one step closer to achieving your version of success.

Successful people:

  1. Move On From the Past
    Successful people are not afraid to move on with life. They do not “waste time feeling sorry for themselves.” Perhaps you have had a traumatic childhood or a very difficult past dealing with drug addiction. Either way, it is up to you to move on from your past because your past is not productive to your future. When people stop dwelling on the past, they bounce back from mistakes faster. They are able to be more successful in life because they do not waste time dwelling on things they cannot change. Instead, they use that extra time to focus on conquering new goals.
  2. Keep Their Power
    Strong people do not give others the power to make them feel inferior. Rather than allowing others to give their opinion, successful people are aware that everyone has a different opinion and that not all opinions matters. Therefore, they know that the only opinion that ultimately matters is the opinion they have of themselves. Even when insults or criticism seems personal, successful people know how to look ahead and ignore the outside forces tearing them down.
  3. Accept Change
    Change is challenging for everyone. However, change is a necessary component of life. Successful people do well with change. An old expression states the only certainty in life Is death and change. Therefore, mentally strong, fearless, successful people think in a way that allows them to make and accept change. Change also is incredibly important in improving your future. If you are stuck on old habits and old mindsets, you will never be able to build up the courage to change who you are for the better. Successful people take on the challenge of change.
  4. Applaud Other People’s Success
    Successful people are encouraged, not negative, when others in their life experience success. Jealously and resentment can prohibit you from reaching your optimum level of success. It takes strength to feel genuine joy and excitement for others. Successful people are able to differentiate their success from the success of others.
  5. Take Calculated Risks
    Successful people know that risks are a part of life. They are not careless with risks but “weigh the risks and benefits” thoroughly, and will fully assess the potential downsides and even the worst-case scenarios before they take action,” the article notes. Risks are what make life interesting and not taking risks can keep you in a stale stagnant place. Successful people are able to take risks when it makes sense to them.
  6. Remain Resilient
    Successful people are able to remain resilient when they fail. Let’s face it: Successful people fail to. The only difference is that they get up and never stop fighting for their success. Successful people are able to fail and fail again as long as each failure provides a learning experience and can help bring them closer to reaching their ultimate goal. Sometimes failure teaches you more than success. Learning how to grow from failure is an excellent tool for achieving your goals.
  7. Earn Their Wins
    Successful people earn their success. They do not expect it. They do not feel like the world owes them anything. Successful people know that it requires effort to achieve success. They do not expect to be handed their wants and needs. Successful people know that through hard work, eventually they will earn everything they want in life. The world may not owe them anything, however they know the only way to achieve anything is through working hard for it.

Everyone has a different definition of success. Whether it is a career, family or personal goals, the only way to achieve those goals is by living and breathing them. Hard work will eventually pay off. Overcoming your addiction could be one hurdle you need to overcome most to get on the path to success. Therefore, if you are struggling, you need to admit your weaknesses and get on the right path today. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please call toll-free 1-800-951-6135.

6 Signs of Being Too Dependent

6 Signs of Being Too Dependent

(This content is being used for illustrative purposes only; any person depicted in the content is a model)

Author: Justin Mckibben

It isn’t always easy to see the signs of being too dependent, especially in ourselves, but a lot of us have developed some emotional habits that put us in a position to depend on others in some form or another. They say we all need somebody to lean on… but how much is too much, and how many of us depend on others to the point where we would collapse without them?

These signs are not always easy to read and identify with, because of course we all want to believe we can be independent and strong as an individual, so seeing a reflection in the mirror that tells us we exhibit dependent characteristics is going to bruise the ego a bit.

Every person struggling with independence will one day reach a point when they realize they cannot climb any higher in life without taking a few steps alone, self-discovery. Those of us who battle with dependency issues can apply our dependent nature to all types of things, including:

So here are just 6 signs of being too dependent. Maybe some of these apply to you, and maybe that means it is time to sever some ties, take off the training wheels and find a way without depending on others for happiness, security and purpose.

  1. Can’t make everyday decisions on their own

Now before we get too far into this, appreciate the fact that of course if you’re going to make a major life decision that could alter the course of your future then I’m not giving you grief for talking it over and getting a variety of opinions from family and friends. By all means, crowd source the heavy stuff.

But with being too dependent we are talking about being incapable of making everyday decisions without someone else’s guidance, or every time the decision is made it is motivated by fear instead of logic.

  1. Fear of confrontation  

The fear of confrontation follows along with a lot of the other fears of someone who struggles with being codependent, such as the fear of failure or the fear of making the wrong decisions on their own.

A person who is too dependent frequently does not feel worthy of having an opinion, especially one that differs from the opinion of someone else they feel they need, and to express that opinion seems even more impossible. If you notice yourself holding back on speaking your mind and standing for what you believe in because it might not work with someone else, it is a very real sign of being too dependent.

  1. Fear of failure

People who are too dependent tend to shy away from being exposed and vulnerable because it may cause others to realize how “worthless” they really are.

The fear of being a failure and having your weaknesses put on public display can cause immense anxiety for someone who is too dependent. For people used to depending on others it is easier to avoid failure by not taking initiative or following through with actions. People who are too dependent typically find themselves abandoning their goals before they even get started on the journey.

  1. Cannot be alone

Always expecting the worst is part of being too dependent, and this sense of impending dread often leads them to not feeling competent enough to live their own lives without others.

Being alone means being vulnerable and unprotected, which are both things overly dependent people will try to alleviate with the presence of other people… even if those other people are not good for them.

To someone who is overly dependent it is impossible to comprehend having to cope with whatever life throws at them on their own- so of course people who are too dependent rely on the stability and strength of others to see them through… even if those other people aren’t as stable or as strong as the dependent would believe.

  1. Always seeking approval

This may especially hard for a dependent person to acknowledge, because no one wants to admit they are a people pleaser. One was that people who are too dependent trick themselves into justifying their overly dependent and unhealthy behavior is by adopting the other person’s expectations as their own.

If the person struggling with being dependent “fails”, they assume it is a failure not only to the expectations of the other person but also their own, and thus each failure reinforces the detrimental judgment of self.

Dependent people crave validation and approval. Some would say a dependent person desires approval as desperately as an alcoholic craves a drink, so an alcoholic with a dependent personality in relationships has a lot standing against them.

  1. Lack of Boundaries

In most cases the only boundary the person has is to be included in the relationship they latch onto, and subsequently all other personal boundaries are unsolidified and traversable if it helps them keep their grip on that desired relationship.

This unhealthy and self-depreciating willingness to ignore or alter personal boundaries in order to maintain a relationship creates a vulnerability that some people look to exploit.

Some personality types are happy to find out how much a person is willing to give, then use them for all they have for as long as they can. The needs are never met, and the dependent person will never feel enough- this cycle is terrible and tragic, and so many people who have to rebuild emotionally due to drugs or alcohol tend to become overly dependent in some aspect of their life, putting them in greater danger than they realize.

Overall, becoming independent in any kind of relationship can end up supporting your sobriety exponentially. In some cases, it can lead to relapse. In recovery we learn to be less dependent on people and instead rely on our principles and our actions, along with a spiritual fitness. If you or someone you love is struggling with substance abuse or addiction, please call toll-free 1-800-951-6135

free treatment ebook

Categories

Accepted Insurance Types Please call to inquire
Call Now